Biggest Successes This Month:

I feel like I am more aware now of choices in all aspects of my life.  I seem to catch myself before the old habitual response kicks in and ask myself; “Do I want this? How do I feel about this? Why am I doing this?”  It isn’t like I am always totally aware, but there does seem to be a shift in my thinking, which I feel is a big step.

Biggest Challenges This Month:

I feel at times like I haven’t accomplished my initial goal dealing with physical health and exercise.  I keep coming back to the statement, “I need to move more”.  I haven’t figured it out totally, but I think there’s a part of me that doesn’t feel like I’m really exercising as much as I should.  I see my spouse go jogging in the morning and because I’m not doing that kind of exercise, I think I’m not accomplishing what I should.  Then I think, why do I think I “should” do anything?  I know I am moving more than before.  I’m actually looking forward to it, not dreading it, or making excuses why I can’t do the exercise.  Isn’t that enough for now?  Knowing that this is a big change for me, can I embrace that knowledge and move into the next phase of my program?

Mid-Program Reflection:

I was a little disappointed by the measurements.  I felt different, yet the weight and waist/hip measurements didn’t change.  The body fat percentage did drop though, so I‘m glad to have some reinforcement that the changes I’ve made have shown up somewhere physically.

I think the A-ha moment within the mid-program reflection was the life balance wheel I had to fill out again.  Most areas of my life got a larger satisfaction rating.  When I looked at the initial wheel and saw how low some of the areas were rated, I was surprised.  Did I really feel that unhappy with so many areas of my life?  Have these aspects gotten that much better?  Or is it because I feel better overall, they seem more positive and fulfilled?

I think I needed to work on the overall balance in my life  in order to move on to fulfilling the physical health and exercise portion of my goals.  I thought of my spouse who exercises faithfully, sometimes obsessively, yet awareness of the overall balance of life is not always there.  So, I need to keep in mind when I feel that I’ve “failed” or not achieved what I thought I would at the beginning of the program, that overall I am more balanced.  I have become more aware of what I want and need in the moment. I don’t always follow it though, and I notice how I feel more edgy or irritated when I don’t or can’t.  If awareness is the first step to achieving permanent change in my life, then I feel I have gotten past the first step.

Click here to see "Pat's" mid-program results

Unexpected Differences I’ve Noticed in Other Areas of My Life:

It seems that I have had to deal with conflict and voicing my opinions more lately.  While it’s been difficult, I seem to have become more willing and less afraid to confront issues.  Rosie gave me handout about the choices we can make.  Do I take the Judger Path or the Learner path?  If I am obsessing about a particular problem; Why?  What am I getting out of it?  Am I blaming others?  Do I own my own responsibility in it?  Can I express myself and move on, or do I dwell on the problem too much?  Am I getting something out of the Drama of the situation?   Stopping to look at things differently can be powerful.  It seems even in everyday life there are the habitual emotional responses I need to examine as well as the ones related to my physical health. 

Insights or Major “A-Ha” Moments:

I’ve caught myself with small things, like taking a bite out of Valentine candy and stopping to think , “Why am I eating this” and throwing the rest away.  We had a weekend with friends and indulged in gourmet food, wine, and chocolate cake.  I had some, but also stopped myself because I wanted to and because I  felt full.  Usually I would keep eating or drinking and tell myself it was ok because it was a special occasion.  Then the next day, or next hour I would feel too full and then be angry with myself and my choices. 

I was having trouble being motivated enough to do the exercise machine at home.  I tried to change a few things, like using music, or watching TV in the reflection of a picture that I could see from the other room.  It also helped a lot to try to be more in the moment when I exercise.  I try to feel my muscles working.  I try to think of how my body will feel when I’m done and that I am helping my body become stronger.  I’ll change my foot positions to target specific muscle groups and that helps me go longer than I usually would.  I find I’m not watching the time as much and wanting the minutes to be over with.

My Goals/Plans for Month 4 and the Second Half of the Program:

I want to explore my need to move more; what that means for me and why I don’t feel I’m doing it.  I want to continue with my self awareness yet really focus more on the physical health and making exercise and eating well part of my daily habit.  If I can achieve that on a permanent basis so it feels like a regular part of my life and not something I have to “fit it”, I think the changes will last longer and be more effective for me.

I also recognize the fact that without the coaching with Rosie I would not be as far as I am in my self awareness.  It goes beyond checking in and feeling accountable with someone else.  It  is empowering to have someone with the knowledge and expertise to help you with choices in your life.  I think many people have some insight, yet our lives are so busy that there may not be the time to really stop and think about things and explore what comes up for each of us.  It is also rare for people to have a chance to have someone focus on them and what they need to explore and talk about, even if it is only for 10 or 15 minutes a week, it makes a big difference.  I never thought much about lifestyle or intrinsic coaches before, but now I know they can make a huge difference in the success of a goal.